The Eldritch Horror of Online Dating

Before I hooked back up with my wonderful man I went through the horrid gauntlet of online dating. *shudder* One of the worst things I had to deal with was the dating site OKCupid. I had a sort of love/hate relationship with that site because on the one hand it was free and pretty much as soon as I put my profile up I would have a date lined up by the end of the week. On the other hand, I would get multitudes of badly misspelled, usually offensive and often inappropriate messages from prospective suitors.

But you know what annoyed me more than those? When I would message a guy and he would write back some variation of “Sorry, I’m not interested”.

I never understood that. Why? Why are you wasting your time and mine just to tell me you’re not interested? I’m a big girl, I’m not invested in this interaction at all. Trust me, if you never wrote me back I would figure out your lack of interest all on my own.

Maybe it’s a sign of my generation or something, maybe older generations feel it’s rude not to “close the loop”, not to reply back. But, trust me, the messages that pissed me off the most were the “Hi, thanks but no” messages. One guy wrote me back just to say, “Sorry, I’ve fallen in love with someone I met on the site so I’m taken.”

I deleted my profile for awhile after that one because I was so annoyed. I guess consider this a public service message, dudes who do online dating: If you’re not interested you don’t have to say anything. Promise. Most girls are smart and will figure it out when you never write them back. Really.

 

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2 Comments

  1. I mean, I found the worst offenders were those who were like “omg! we like the same books and movies and comics! wanna fuck??” hahaha. Yes, it can be understood that by not replying, they’re obviously not interested, but maybe they’re just attempting to be polite? Better to know that something’s not an option than to lust after it, I suppose. Either way, I get it and I don’t take it personally.

    • Well, yeah, those always sucked too. OKC in general sucks. LOL.

      I just never understood replying though. It felt more rude to me than not replying. Over the internet I feel like no response means no. Shrug.

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